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Gone. Has a commitment. And apparently the second one as well. Bot are gone. Sure, maybe it's only matter of time.. temporary problem. But after it's solved it's too late.
Hey, wake up! You have a beafutiful girlfriend, who can teach you so much. You have two best friends and one close friend as well.
Can be. So why there's the feeling about losing them? They are distant now. We are talking, opening up.. and still they are strange.
There was a wedding, remember? One girl was merrying her best friend, also girl. No women, still girls.. it was supposed to be fun. One of them, surely the one I called "mine", got drunk. What a pity view. She was laying on the ground like a toad. So she looked like. And I realised who am I dating.. Despite this I saved her from the drunken boys around, helped her up to wash herself. She was vomiting. Long time. I sat right behind the bathroom doors and hoped she let me in, so I could help her, hold her. She didn't - chose to be alone.
The party was terminated, people moved to the rooms inside the building; I was supposed to be there with them, but I stayed.
Took care about her and lay her down to sleep. And hold her hand.
I saw her swollen face.. and knew she's not beautiful; but I loved her. Well, I thought I do, and also thought she loves me as well.
Seem I was wrong.
And here we comes again! Wondering what that mighty love could be. Just like the two times before.
Now the result is more prosaic. Love itself - no crushing in love, or falling in love - is only a habit. Habit which started as an instinct.
Continued as both-side-profitable relation. And then.. only habit with flashes of past.
Anyway.
There's no racial reason for mourning someone you even didn't ask to go with you somewhere.
Well, I was just about to! And it's the lost option I am mourning.
Still. You have girlfriend, right? Do you like her?
Sure I do. But she's not here for ever. The year will end and she'll return to her homeland.
So enjoy the time you spend with her.
I do.
And after all, you're clever, you can find yourself a new girlfriend.
Hm. And what is this good for? Any sympathetic girl who I would be able to ask for a date.. all of them has a problems.
What'S your point? Everybody has problems. You do.
Sure. But not existencial problem.. or family problem.. or really bad experiences with boys in the past. Mine problems are tiny in comparision with theirs.
So?
I don't want any more relations based on the fact I wanted to help her! That's what I said first time, remember? The day she wrote me she had betrayed? Coldly, with no excuse, just jeering at my face? Through the internet?
I remember.
So you know I did this mistake for the second time.
I do.
And can you tell me, how it ended?
Not quite good.
Precisely. I don't want to be a rescuer for my partner. Do you hear the difference? I need partner, not patient.
So?
So?! You just don't want to understand, do you? Nearly every girl I know, even the older ones (!), has this kind of big troubles. Everybody needs help and consolation. I like helping people, solving their problems.. but also can't resist the charm of girls personalities.. they are so amazing, you see!
Amazing, but no partners.
No. The relation is more like parent-child.. and even I like the way they hug and I feel need to save them..
I know.
Thanks. Sometimes I doubt about all of this. That out there are no relative balanced girls. And I noticed most of this troubles comes from the family background. The family of today is sick. Produces sick people. Like zombies, but with hearts filled with feelings and such a confused minds.
Hope you're wrong.
So do I, so do I.
Well, enough, all everybody would think were are crazy or something :o) That we have a great problem, you know?
What if? I don't feel this problem with big P. I have great familly, I study really interesting subject and have friends (with Problems!) and girlfriend (temporary, and also with a Problem.. but it seem to be one of the lesser, at least) and much work to do (shit).
She's driving you met, guy. Now you are even thinking in english (and with gramatic mistakes, what a shame!) |